Making money in a nutshell, part 1 – blogging

moneyWho wants to be rich? Yeah, sounds pretty good. The life of luxury, sipping cocktails on a beach somewhere in the Caribbean. Or, flying your own private jet around the world, pushing solid gold soccer balls out the window while laughing hysterically. OK, so that last one may not be everyone’s exact fantasy, but who hasn’t dreamt of smoking a cigar made entirely from hundred dollar bills?

Well, if you want untold riches*, all you have to do is read this series of blog articles and you can’t possibly fail.

This inaugural segment is about making money on the internet, specifically, from blogging. That’s right, make money from blogging. Has this been done? Well, even if it has, you should too.
OK so here’s what you need to do:

  1. Start a blog. There are oodles of places to do this for nothing. blogspot is one.
  2. Set up some advertising. Google Ads is one option, but there are others. People are pretty creative with this one, for instance, promoting products in their blog in order to score freebies. Research might help on this if you really want to buy a jet with your blog income.
  3. Start writing articles. On the internet, content is king. Apparently.
  4. Rake in the cash.

That sounds so easy, why isn’t everyone doing it? Well, there’s the thing. Turns out lots of people like spouting off. Your blog needs to attract visitors. How to do this?

  • Tell all your friends to visit your blog. You need a lot of friends for this method to earn you a Ferrari.
  • Trick people into visiting your site. Being sneaky often pays off. For instance, recently, a teen got kicked out of home for underage drinking. But her parents made a deal. If she could find 1 million people that drank underage and still turned out normal, she could stay. She put this on her myspace site and attracted many visitors. This is the kind of scam that will bring home the bacon.
  • Write about stuff you are interested in. A lot of people try this. You may as well buy a lottery ticket while you’re at it. Who else could possibly be interested in the same thing as you? Most likely, this is not the path to inconceivable wealth.
  • Write about stuff you think other people are interested in. In other words, sell out. What are other people interested in? Making money. Exactimundo. Also, people like porn and celebrity gossip. I have already taken the idea of writing about making money, so I would recommend you make your blog about either porn or celebrity gossip. Or both – celebrity porn.

OK, so now you know one of the big secrets of untold wealth. When you hit the big time, please remember your old pal, supernifty, that set you on the path to glory.

* Don’t assume that ‘untold riches’ refers to material wealth. It may simply refer to the satisfaction one feels in the soul after a hard day’s labour with little more than your tired bones to show for it.

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